The Reluctant Leader

What makes a person a leader?  This is something that I’ve struggled with for many years.  The easiest definition I could find was the following:

Leader – Google Search

Seems simple enough, but what truly makes a person a leader?  Is it their knowledge?  Their charisma?  Their talent?  There doesn’t appear to be a single all-encompassing answer to that question.  Some leaders have a little from column A and a little from column B; others are purely column A or column B.  And still the rare mavericks have something from another page altogether. Continue reading “The Reluctant Leader”


In my previous life, I was well-connected.  From morning til night, I found myself in front of a computer for nearly every instant that I was not working or sleeping.  Actually, even sleep did not always dissuade me as I’d often pull my laptop next to my bed in case someone would message me in the middle of the night.  (I did have friends in Australia, Europe and on the West coast after all!)  I would get up in the morning and the first thing I did was sign in.  I would get home from work – sign in.  I had even set up my apartment so that while seated at my computer, I could watch TV.  My life consisted of being online. I had become an extension of the internet.

It was during these years (the majority of my 20’s really) that I “disconnected” from the real world and connected electronically.  All of my friends were chat buddies.  I would spend countless hours in chat rooms, or just messaging my friends.  I’d communally watch TV with people, chatting about the show during commercials.  (How many “OMG can you believe that?!” conversations about Lost did we have Nat?) Continue reading “Disconnected”

Warren Zevon quote - I'll sleep when I'm dead.

I’ll sleep when I’m dead

For the past 15-20 years, I have been an occasional insomniac.  It happens at least twice a year, but never lasting more than 3-4 days consecutively.  I’ll just lay there; awake, unable to get to sleep.  Typically my brain will go into overdrive and won’t shut down long enough to let me fall asleep.  Other times, I just have this feeling of discomfort in my own body and I can’t lie there any longer.  While I haven’t really had a full blown occurrence of this in some time, earlier this week I lay awake in bed for a while, struggling to fall asleep. Continue reading “I’ll sleep when I’m dead”

Second Life Day

March 3, 2008 marked a new chapter in the book of my life.  Eight years ago today, was my Second Life Day. I was rushed to the hospital in a near-comatose state in a story that I’ve repeated ad nauseum. I don’t want to retread on the same story, but can’t help but be contemplative today. How my life has changed in the past eight years, largely thanks to that life-altering event, is remarkable. The changes and evolution that I’ve made both on a personal and spiritual level are impressive. Or at least they are to me, which is frankly all that matters. Continue reading “Second Life Day”


Do you believe in magic?

That’s how the song goes.  (Am I referring to the classic by The Lovin’ Spoonful?  Or the jingle for the restaurant with the golden arches?)  With the recent passing of Alan Rickman (Professor Snape in the Harry Potter movies for those unaware), I’ve found myself thinking about magic in all of its many forms, so that will be the basis for my post today.  Apologies for the rambling and stream-of-consciousness that is to ensue. Continue reading “Magic”