Today, we say goodbye to my mother-in-law, Pauline Maillet.

Pauline was an artistic soul. She loved any kind of crafts but focused more on painting over the last 10-15 years. She had talent, even if she didn’t always see it herself. Our home has some of her pieces decorating the walls. We have a stack of hand painted cards that she gave us throughout the years. Our Christmas tree is probably about 50% covered with ornaments that Pauline made throughout the years. We have little bits of her oeuvre all around our home.

Pauline was a foodie, even if she may not have described herself that way. She loved to find new recipes and try them out. (Or more aptly, she loved to find new recipes and make her husband, Bob, try them out!) And nothing went better with a good meal than a glass of wine.

Unlike the pop culture representations of the annoying, cold, bitchy mother-in-law, Pauline was a warm, welcoming, caring and exuberant woman. I can honestly say that I wish I had told her how happy I was to have her in my life; how loved and accepted I felt from the very beginning of my relationship with Isabelle. Pauline would dote over me because of my diabetes in the early days – adjusting recipes to cut out sugar, endlessly ask me questions about my disease and what I could or couldn’t do. She legitimately wanted to better understand so she could do something to help me in whatever way she could. To some it might have come across as overbearing, but I saw it for what it was – caring.

Above all, Pauline was a proud mother. She fiercely loved her daughter and was unimaginably proud of her. She was her number one fan. Anytime my darling wife would do something and share the news with her parents, you could see the awe and excitement wash over Pauline’s face. Whether it was to leave her job in the school system to move into a governmental job, to launch an in-home side-gig baking cakes and cupcakes, or whether it was writing and publishing two books earlier this year, Pauline was enamored with everything her beloved daughter would do. She embarked immediately on whatever journey her daughter was going on, never doubting that she would succeed.

I don’t believe there is a single individual alive who has met Pauline who would not remember her. She was a vibrant, energetic character who would converse with anyone and everyone. She wanted people to feel engaged and included. It may be that she was trying to make others feel what she herself needed to feel in her life, but through it all, there was genuine love, kindness and affection. She was often a larger than life character who has indubitably left her mark on everyone that she knew.

In lieu of my usual set of questions at the end of my blog post, I will instead assign homework. I want every single person who reads this message to go see or talk to your mother and/or father today. Even those of you whose parents are gone, just talk to them. Tell them you love them.

While not my mother in a natural sense, Pauline embraced me into their family early on. I am so very grateful for her presence in my life over these past years. I may never have called her that in person, but I truly did see her as a second mother. I wish I had told her…

Goodbye Mom. I love you.

Rest in peace.